Pete Shea's Waterguard Cartoons

Page contents:

• AN EQUAL OPPORTUNITIES EMPLOYER
• AN 'OUTING' TO A DISTILLERY
• DRUG DETECTION DOGS
• HELP WITH HOUSE PURCHASE
• ON RETIREMENT

• PETE  JOINS 'THE JOB'
• 'ROBBIE' BURNS
• STEEPLECHASE SEASON
• THE CRUISE
• THE 'QUEEN' OF TEAS

• THE 'TROUBLES'
• WE ARE HERE TO HELP THE PUBLIC
• WORLD POLICE & FIRE GAMES
• YO HO AND UP SHE RISES
• YOU LEARN SOMETHING NEW EVERY DAY

'PETE'

'I met Pete Shea when I was posted to LAP in the mid 1960's and it was not long before I was introduced to the humorous, and sometimes wicked, world of Pete's Waterguard cartoons. His outstanding artistic talent combined with his sharp wit and humour, saw the 'day to day' life of the Waterguard in a refreshingly unique light. His drawings seemed to appear almost daily, reflecting the life at Heathrow - the highs and the lows, the funny and the absurd. His take on 'management' was often seen as insubordination - but was accurate and to the point and always extremely funny! Pete is a member of the Cartonist Guild   

The cartoons presented here are just a taste of Pete's great talent. They are all C&E related but extend well beyond the Waterguard years . . . . . . . . but so did Pete!' - Trevor Tomasin

Published in The Bond - May 2003.

'. . . . . . . Suffice that around 1990 my "opposite number" in the Department of Trade, after an arduous multi Department meeting, told me that he was having nightmares that the negotiations on the Single Market would fall miserably because of the apparently insoluble issue of banana quotas.''

Published in The Bond - December 2005

'Before we left the Bottling Manager admitted that he had spent his earlier career as a Chief Steward on a Passenger Liner so we owed it all to him. He had obviously organised the lunch so we will leave it there.'

Published in The Bond - October 2005

Published in Portcullis - August 1987

'He's not really a VIP - Just a local Estate Agent'

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Published in The Customs Journal Portcullis - March 1965

Published in Portcullis - August 1987

STEEPLECHASE SEASON . . . . . . . !

'Don't you know? - It's the first day of the Steeplechase Season!

Published in The Customs Journal - November 1970

THE CRUISE . . . . . . .

'My wife Marion and I had not had a “proper” holiday for about two years, except for the odd trip to Whitley Bay and Sidmouth, so the booking of a cruise in 2003 was a cause for some excitement. . . . . . . . '

Published in The Bond - October 2003

THE 'QUEEN' OF TEAS . . . . . . .

At the last minute word reached us that the Queen drank only a certain type of tea and Buckingham Palace was telephoned. We were told that the brand in question was sold only by a well-known firm in The Strand. A taxi was summoned and the manageress visited this shop only to be told that they were authorised to sell the particular "Royal" blend only with the consent of the Palace. A return trip was made to Custom House and a frantic call to the Queen's Equerry established that they would authorise the purchase. Another taxi was summoned and finally the tea was procured!

With my mother-in-law in mind and knowing she considered herself a connoisseur of tea I sweet talked the manageress into giving me a couple of spoons full of the tea which had caused her so much hassle. Fully expecting to go up in mother-in-law's estimation I made her a brew with the prized tea leaves on her next visit. To my embarrassment and consternation she took one sip and asked me if I had made the tea with old hay!

Published in The Bond - October 2005

'THE TROUBLES' . . . . . .

Customs posts and patrol offices were frequent targets for IRA attention leaving the officers temporarily without any official accommodation.

Published in Portcullis April - May 1972 - A Belfast Special Edition

WE ARE HERE TO HELP THE PUBLIC . . . . . . .

'At Whitchurch Airport - Bristol - in about 1953 the daily morning flight was a DeHavilland Dove belonging to Cambrian Airways from Rhoose Airport - Cardiff -  to Paris. One morning, the Captain reported a magneto drop on the port engine, a fault which would cause progress to be cancelled. "Any plugs?" was my response. "Yes" was the answer.

Having not long completed my National Service as an Engine mechanic in the RAF, including being trained on the "Gipsy" Major at RAF Henlow, I offered my services. The Gipsy Queen which powered the Dove had 6 cylinders as opposed to the Major's 4. The plugs were duly changed, the engine tested. Captain checked the work done, cowling restored, and so off to Paris.'

Published in The Bond - January 2005

YO HO HO AND UP SHE RISES . . . . . .

'In 1963 the Commissioners Blake and Pepper, a martyr to sea-sickness, and the Inspector General of Waterguard, Charlie Douglas were on a tour of inspection of remote distilleries in the Western Isles on  the new revenue cutter Venturous.

One morning a couple of days into the trip I left my cabin aft to go to the bridge. It was blowing a near gale, with spray drenching the weather deck. An alternative foul-weather route for'ard was via the saloon. As I reached the door, at the end of a short and very strait alleyway, it was flung open and I was confronted by Commissioner Pepper, a desperate expression in his eyes and cheeks-a-bulge like Dizzie Gillespie’s. It was one of those timeless, eternal moments you experience in the middle of a car crash: nothing you can do. What velocity! All over my yachting shoes, a Commissioner’s breakfast.''

Published in The Bond - July 2003

YOU LEARN SOMETHING NEW EVERY DAY . . . .

'I learned that the Swiss had a merchant navy!''

Published in The Bond - June 2005

WORLD POLICE AND FIRE GAMES - 2003 . . . . . .

The Team hotel, “The Catalunya Atenas”, was not quite a “Fawlty Towers”, but heading along those lines. Usually only one of the three lifts was working and, if any of the others were working, they were likely to stop between floors. Evening meal menus in the hotel were displayed in the lifts – nowhere else - it gave you something to read whilst stuck between floors, but if you could identify anything in the restaurant that was on the lift menu you were doing well

Published in The Bond - November 2003

ON RETIREMENT . . . . . . . . .

Published in The Bond - September 2003.