LIVERPOOL

Arthur Winstanley and the Donkey

'In the days when we were paid our overtime in cash in the middle of the month . . . . . . Arthur had been doing his bit to help the licensed trade, and  on his way back home on the Wirral, came across the 'Donkey Man' who ran the kids' donkey rides on the beach taking his charges back to the stables  for the night. Arthur thought that he'd get a donkey as a surprise present for his wife.

He arrived home with the donkey and tethered it in the front garden. His wife apparently went ballistic and made him promise to take the donkey back the next day. The next morning, Arthur was not only short of a lot of his overtime, but also most of the plants in his front garden - eaten by the donkey. He did get the Donkey Man to buy back the donkey at a fraction of the price he paid for it. There'll never be another!' - Charlie Mansour

 

GLADSTONE DOCK

Fresh Fish Of British Taking

'There are a legion of memories of Bill Gross' Preventive activities, but one of my favourites was when he was serving as a PO at Gladstone dock he boarded a Blue Funnel boat from the Far East. Later, on scrutinising the C142 he discovered that the Chief Steward had declared a tank of tropical fish - presumably Koi carp. Whist Bill was pondering how to surmount this problem without production of the necessary licence, 'Big' Macgregor his APO, suggested that he write them of as 'Fresh fish of British Taking'. He did and got away with it! 'Big' Mac later related, 'can you imagine the steward sat on a bridge in Kobe with a rod and line saying here's another one of British taking' - Alan Stirling

 

HUSKISSON DOCK

What's My Line

PRINCES LANDING STAGE

John O'Keefe's Memories

WORKINGTON

Jam Session

'The complement was three, two PO’s and one APO with a CPO who covered all the small ports on the Cumberland Coast.

In the early hours of the morning, boarding a foreign arrival ore carrier and having finished checking and sealing the Bond, the Chief Steward, George Smith PO and myself were making our way back from the storeroom aft to the Chief Steward’s accommodation amidships when George spied a piano in the crew's mess.

Now George was a bit of a honky-tonk pianist so in he went to give it a try. It was not too far out of tune so he began a rendition of some of his 'sing-along' repertoire. Not to be outdone, one of the AB’s who was Spanish appeared with his guitar and another took hold of the tea chest double base whilst the Chief Steward found some bongo drums and so the impromptu session began. Well the sound of Smoke Gets In Your Eyes by this combo was a sound for deaf ears.

It made me think that over the years  England could sleep easily in her bed as the steely eyed Revenue Men were on the job!' - Allen Sadler

 

CPM’s Tale

'Another tale from one of our Coast Preventive Men concerned the old CPO that used to be stationed at Workington. His name was Bob Hope and was a bit of a tyrant to all accounts.

Some may recall that in those days CPM's had to submit a patrol programme to the CPO for approval. This was a long form that took some time to complete and read like a bus timetable showing when and where they would be with times of arrival and departure from each point.

In the old days they did their patrols on motorbike no matter what the weather. If Bob had been out to meet one of them and had missed them, the next day in the post would arrive a sketch. This would show a drawing of the location with a person sitting in a car, stating the time and date with a big question mark and WHERE WERE YOU!'  - Allen Sadler

Musical PO’s

'Both the POs at Workington were good musicians. George Smith was an accomplished 'sing-along' pianist and accordionist whilst John Millar, the other PO, was a classical pianist, music teacher and French horn player.

George told a story of one occasion when John who was on late's had disappeared to play in a local orchestra and a local well know Public School.

During his absence the Waterguard Superintendent rang and wanted to speak to John immediately. Well a small panic ensued as George made excuses about him being out and about. He then had to ring the school and interrupt the Headmaster in the middle of the performance and ask him to get John to return immediately.

This did not go down well and the word sacrilege was used to describe John’s immediate departure from the orchestra. He did make it back in time to call the Superintendent.' - Allen Sadler

 

How To Square The File

'George told another tale of how when he was a newly promoted PO he did a spell of relief at Workington in the early fifties before he was sent to Heathrow. I may not have the facts exactly correct with regard to the then Regulations but as it was just after the Second World War all monies had to be declared on a C142. One seaman had declared fifteen pounds, which apparently had to be placed under seal, but George hadn’t shown how he had dealt with it.

Bob Hope the CPO soon had the file in the post and George attempted to write this off and so sent it back. It came back by return of post with some acid comments from the CPO. George sat in the office lost as what to do next when one of the “old stagers” asked what was up. He was shown the C142, looked at the offending entry of  'fifteen pounds' and wrote after it “of tea”.

The file was sent back and never heard of again.' - Allen Sadler